It is one thing for children to honour their parents (Ephesians 6:1-3), but what about the other way around?  This verse would have been somewhat counter-cultural in the 1st Century when children would have been seen and not heard: they had no rights, only duties.  But here we see God's heart for children (Psalm 103:13).  Fathers must not be unfeeling dragons or heartless monsters; they have a special duty of loving towards their children. Young people certainly need training and instruction, but every bit of information and skill needs to be placed into the context of relating together in love.  It is also the model of pastoral ministry (1 Thessalonians 2:11).

Exasperation is the final boiling-over of frustration: the point at which non-communication has reached its peak and the child can no longer tolerate the injustice of cold, loveless demands.  This verse does not justify angry emotional ventilation, but reminds fathers to consider how much a child can take: and it should never get that far.  Although the reaction is the child's, the provocation is from the father - and he is held accountable for the child's reaction.  Of course, some parents never set any standards or expect anything, and those children also get frustrated because they lack the safety of reasonable boundaries and achievable goals set for them.

John the Baptist was twice prophesied (Malachi 4:6) as having a special role in preparing whole families to get ready to welcome God, in the person of the Lord Jesus Christ.  "And he will go on before the Lord, in the spirit and power of Elijah, to turn the hearts of the parents to their children and the disobedient to the wisdom of the righteous – to make ready a people prepared for the Lord." (Luke 1:17).  Those who announce the gospel - not only proclaim the right way to relate with God but also the godly way to relate in families, to behave towards our children as the Lord does towards us (Matthew 19:13-15).

Some parents may focus on school achievements as an indicator of success, but this verse tells us that the most important training is about the Lord - His love, sacrifice and His desire to enter the heart of every child (Deuteronomy 6:7).  The parent who believes this should also start to model the loving nurture of Christ in which the child will feel safe.  No extra sports coaching or maths tutoring can teach God's essentials of living; and without those essentials, children can become well educated but emotionally frustrated people, seeking whatever relationship or activity they can to feel loved.  And every extra parental demand produces extra frustration.  That is why we need to work hard at parenting, honouring the heart which God has given our children.  Colossians 3:21 says, "Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged".  Where we get it wrong we need to ask our children's forgiveness as well as God's.  Let the years of bringing up children leave a legacy of love and joy in the Lord to pass on to the next generation.