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Loving to Give Everything

Ephesians 5:25-27
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. (NIVUK)

There is no doubt that most husbands want their wives to radiate loveliness.  But how does that happen?  The way in which Jesus Christ has treated us, flawed and corrupted human beings, is also God's pattern for marriage (Ephesians 5:22-24).  Without the loving self-sacrifice of the Lord Jesus, we would have no freedom from guilt on earth, nor any legitimate hope of heaven; without His grace there would be nothing eternally desirable about us at all (Hebrews 9:14-15).  But through the sacrificial blood of Christ we can be confident that we are loved and will be loved for ever (Ephesians 2:13).  Our salvation was at the cost of Jesus laying down His life.

That is how God intends that husbands should love their wives!  In the same way that Christ's actions were governed by a very deep desire to see us released from all that would keep us away from being all that He intends us to be ... so Christian husbands should be motivated by a desire to see their wives fulfilled, whatever that may cost the husband.  This instantly transfers marriage from the world of mutual-taking to mutual-giving, with the husband having the default responsibility of giving most.

These verses are not a recommendation to husbands but a command.  It does not follow the culture, either of the 1st Century or of our age.  But it is the culture of heaven.  Revelation 21:1-4 says, "Then I saw 'a new heaven and a new earth,' for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea. I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, 'Look! God's dwelling-place is now among the people, and he will dwell with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. "He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death" or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.'"

That is not how either Christianity or marriage is presented in the media.  The idea of giving until it hurts and then still giving more, seems ludicrous.  But when we get to know our Saviour and realise the depths to which He has stooped for us, He starts to make an impression on our value system.  Then we will want to give and help and love in such a way that we are willing to give ourselves up for others.  It is the gospel principle that works through our hearts in the home and will inevitably start to show in the workplace too.  Willing endurance and patient kindness do not grow on trees; they are fruits of the Spirit of God who wants to make us more like Jesus (Galatians 5:22-24).  And when that happens, everybody notices!

Prayer 
Dear Lord. Thank You for Your supreme sacrifice for me, to enable me to grow like You. Forgive me for my reluctance to sacrifice what I have so that others may receive help and blessing. Help me to practise Your self-giving character in my home, so that the difference will be evident everywhere. In Jesus' Name. Amen.
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© Dr Paul Adams